TLDR; Brother-in-law cheated on Sister-in-law (wife's sister). Advice?
The details:
So my wife has a sister, we'll call her Jane. She's 3 years older than my wife, and got married (to John) about 6 months before us (married 7 years this fall). John is a bit older than her, by like 8 years I think (I like giving irrelevant info, as you'll see if you read this whole thing).
I didn't find out any of the below info until today.
So John has been acting a little different the past couple of weeks. He would go out drinking with friends and get so drunk he couldn't drive home, so he would just spend the night at friends, sometimes not coming home until 5am or 9am. (He has a day job, so maybe the late mornings were on the weekend, not sure). This was just recent behavior, and not something he had been doing previously.
So then yesterday they are at church (pretty sure they go to a Nazarene church, not that it matters to the story), and John gets a text. Jane asks John who it's from, and he says that it's a mutual friend asking about car parts (John's a mechanic). Jane saw the text and saw that it was from a woman. Jane confronts John when they get home, and John admits that those late nights he wasn't really drinking with friends, but was sleeping with this other lady. Jane asks John what he wants to do, he says he doesn't know, and she says he has 24 hours to figure it out. This confrontation happened last night.
I recently helped get Jane a job at my company, so we're going to meet up for lunch in an hour or so (I just found all of this out through my wife). Any thoughts on what I should do/say? I figured I wouldn't give advice, since she still has to talk to him to figure out what they are going to do (stay together, split up, m/s, etc.). I haven't been this close to something like this before (we would get together with them often, live in the same town, etc.).
Additional info from a while ago: Jane wanted kids, always has. When Jane married John, they agreed to wait a few years, then try. After a few years passed and Jane broached the subject, John said absolutely no (his main reason I believe was that he didn't feel comfortable being that responsible for another human's life). They went through a rocky time, and Jane decided to stay with John, despite one of her biggest desires not being met. No idea if this is related to the cheating or not. As far as I know, this is only a recent thing.
Curious what the genius minds of the AO will say.
:popcorn:
The details:
So my wife has a sister, we'll call her Jane. She's 3 years older than my wife, and got married (to John) about 6 months before us (married 7 years this fall). John is a bit older than her, by like 8 years I think (I like giving irrelevant info, as you'll see if you read this whole thing).
I didn't find out any of the below info until today.
So John has been acting a little different the past couple of weeks. He would go out drinking with friends and get so drunk he couldn't drive home, so he would just spend the night at friends, sometimes not coming home until 5am or 9am. (He has a day job, so maybe the late mornings were on the weekend, not sure). This was just recent behavior, and not something he had been doing previously.
So then yesterday they are at church (pretty sure they go to a Nazarene church, not that it matters to the story), and John gets a text. Jane asks John who it's from, and he says that it's a mutual friend asking about car parts (John's a mechanic). Jane saw the text and saw that it was from a woman. Jane confronts John when they get home, and John admits that those late nights he wasn't really drinking with friends, but was sleeping with this other lady. Jane asks John what he wants to do, he says he doesn't know, and she says he has 24 hours to figure it out. This confrontation happened last night.
I recently helped get Jane a job at my company, so we're going to meet up for lunch in an hour or so (I just found all of this out through my wife). Any thoughts on what I should do/say? I figured I wouldn't give advice, since she still has to talk to him to figure out what they are going to do (stay together, split up, m/s, etc.). I haven't been this close to something like this before (we would get together with them often, live in the same town, etc.).
Additional info from a while ago: Jane wanted kids, always has. When Jane married John, they agreed to wait a few years, then try. After a few years passed and Jane broached the subject, John said absolutely no (his main reason I believe was that he didn't feel comfortable being that responsible for another human's life). They went through a rocky time, and Jane decided to stay with John, despite one of her biggest desires not being met. No idea if this is related to the cheating or not. As far as I know, this is only a recent thing.
Curious what the genius minds of the AO will say.
:popcorn:
Brother-in-law slept around
